If you find yourself attracted to people of the same sex it can be a time of mixed feelings and emotions. It may be scary, exciting and confusing. You might wonder why this is happening to you. You might wonder if what you are feeling is normal. You might wonder who to tell and how to tell them. You may even hope that these feelings will go away.
Some people come to terms with these feelings fairly easily. For others, it may take a while to get used to. Take your time, don’t feel you have to tell anyone until you’re ready.
You're not alone
There are thousands of lesbian, gay and bisexual people who are happy and proud of their sexuality. There's no such thing as a typical lesbian, gay or bisexual person - you’ve probably already met other lesbian, gay and bisexual people and may not have even known it. Your sexuality is an important part of what makes you who you are, don’t be afraid to be yourself.
You are just as normal as everyone else
Homosexuality has existed for thousands of years. In the past, lesbian, gay and bisexual people were discriminated against because of fear and ignorance. Homosexuality is not an illness. Being lesbian, gay or bisexual is not something that can be ‘cured’. It doesn’t need to be.
Get support in coming out
If you want to talk about coming out, or any aspect of being lesbian, gay or bisexual, you can contact your local lesbian and gay helpline or gay men’s health project (Fetch! can point you in the right direction). They won’t tell you what to do but they will listen, offer suggestions and respect your decisions. These services are confidential, no matter how young you are.
These groups provide the opportunity to meet with other lesbian, gay and bisexual young people. They can be a good way of making new friends, of talking with other young people who feel like you. You can find out how other young people have come to terms with coming out and how to tell others (such as parents or friends).
Coming out means:
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being honest about yourself
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asking other people to recognise and respect the decision you have made
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not feeling guilty or embarrassed about who you are
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asserting your right to lead a life where you can feel more confident and fulfilled in your sexuality
At work
It's illegal for any employer to discriminate against any employee on the grounds of their sexuality. If you do come out at work and feel you're being harassed or discriminated against because of this, get advice from your union, if you're in one, or go to www.troubleatwork.org.uk .
Thanks to the GAi Project (Broad Street, Hockley, Nottingham) for helping us to write this article.
Useful links
Childline
Get advice, info and help now. Calls are free and confidential
Connexions Direct
Fetch!
Links to useful websites
